I scorched my hand yesterday morning..a stupid reason for the accident though..grrr..i got 4 blisters on my right hand & i cant even hold a pen n write..the pain was so bad that i felt like crying..but the moment i tot of the featured pgm i watched the nite b4 abt this lady who met with a freak accident & lost all her 4 limbs but still carry on living life gracefully, i told myself i have no right to cry over such small issue.."有什么好哭的，烧到手而已嘛" at least i still hav my limbs..i can still feel pain & i can still heal..i forced myself to go to work..bear with the pain & did everything wif my left hand & i survived thruout the day..the feeling is very good..to noe that i m actually strong & handling everything well..

I watched a featured pgm abt this lady who lost all her limbs after a freak accident..She was so down but she managed to survive thru the phase..she live her life strong & positive..i really salute her for her courage & attitude towards life..she said when she was out on streets pple gav her stares as if she's some kind of monster (inconsiderate Singaporeans!), but she'll look back at them & smile..cos she's brave to face it..i feel so ashamed,cos when i get stares frm strangers on streets the 1st tot tat came to me is "is there something wrong wif my face?is my dressing weird today?" but i nv took it in a positive way..pple might b staring cos i look good? (thick-skinned hahah) she's so brave & positive in life given her condition now..wat am i to feel depressed over wat happened..wat i went thru for the past yr is NOTHING compared to wat she went thru..so i told myself, wake up the idea, i muz live life strong & positive..i've no right to feel depressed over small matters..there r so many less fortunate pple ard, i should cherish & count my blessings..

Met moquack at CWP when i reached..when to buy medication for my hand..got a cheap $3.50 gel frm chinese medical hall..had a chat abt life & some recalls of the past..both of us were amazed by how strong a person i used to be (we chatted abt how i survived the illness when i was 17) & moquack almost wanted to strangle me saying that i managed to survive such an ordeal many yrs back how can i let myself fall so low for the past few mths bcos of r/s issues?? n by recalling the past i really felt that i was so bloody strong in mind then..so i told myself..nothing minor is gonna bring me tat down again..i muz really find back that me..i noe i've been saying that so quite sometime..but somehow i think that featured pgm & the recalls of the past somehow is like a wake-up call..knock some senses into my head..i m gonna take control of my life again..i will & i can do it..the whole of yesterday i was handicapped on my right hand, alot pple offer to help me stuff be it at work or after work..but i insisted to do everything myself even though it was tough..moquack said i m stubborn but somehow i feel good to be able to do things all by myself not relying on anyone..that was the old me isnt it? i m gonna keep this going until it becomes a habit juz like tha old me..its such a good feeling~hee..

Juan is goin to live everyday positively..smile more..worry less..take control of my life..i can do it & i will do it.. =D