Thur worked late..he called ard 6+ tellin me he leaving office..but i juz continue to work..called me again ard 7+ told me he meetin Borg to discuss some stuff..then i juz told him go ahead i goin back to work..he reacted in a way which i nv expect..he said "muz so fast put down cannot chat awhile ah?" hmmm quite not him..so chatted wif him for a short while..nothing much asked where me & PY went the nite b4 and how come i m working late..but halfway thru the chat Stanley actually walked past & teased me sayin "work lah dun talk on the phone" then he say nvm ask me go work..hahah i dunno whether i should scold or thank Stanley..after tat left office ard 8+ went TM to buy dinner & while waitin in the queue an Indian guy tried to strike a conversation wif me & asked for my no..i rejected & sms Janice & Yong to tell them abt it and as i expected they had a real gd laugh!
Fri was a rush day at work for me..cos of the long wkend we've to close more logs..but i managed to finished everythin ard 7+ & left office..was still wonderin how come he dint contact me for the whole day & he called frm office..told me he still in office asked me where i m..told him i m at Tamp then he said called me back later..so i went ahead to do my stuff & ard 8+ he called again..asked me if i goin anywhere later i said no then ask him wanna meet mah..he said ok but he sick & tired goin hme..so ended up i da bao to his place & slept early that nite..
He's supposed to wake up at 7 on sat but he asked me to wake him up at 630 so i guessed he might hav wanted to bring me for Mac's breakfast..but frm my guessed i noe its not possible to wake that heavy sleeper up de..so i tried once ard 6.40 he dint wake up i juz let him sleep til 7+..after tat i went hme & after a shower i was bored so i continued wif Heroes S3..watched til ep 8 finally noe wat teh hell they r talking abt..cos S2 was a flop & early eps of S3 were in a mess..took a 2hr nap after lunch & decided to join pet society cos HuiJun was so so strongly recommending it haaha..& thanks to her i found another way to pass time..& the game is soo cute..was playin wif it til i really forgot how fast time flies..cos when he called me at 7+ i dint realized the timing at all..told me he juz left office so we met up for dinner..had dinner at the place beside SIM for 纸包鸡..after that head back to wdls & he asked me wat i wanna do..i asked if he wanna go for a movie he said ok..but after tat i changed my mind cos i c him still feeling unwell..but still he insisted to go for the movie but he wanna rest awhile in the car..so i went to guardian to buy med for him..back to his car he already dozed off..seein him like tat i juz let him sleep..while i played my hp games..while waiting a actually broke my game record! this is funny..he only woke up after hrs & asked how come i dint wake him up to go movie..well,i dunno izzit bcos i m understanding or i juz feel guilty to drag him watch movie when he's feelin tired & sick so i decided to let him sleep for hrs without disturbing him..after tat i feel tired & juz decided to go home..
Sunday was my cousin's wedding dinner at Mt Faber..i woke up in the afternoon..played & chatted wif HuiJun on Pet society til late noon then i started getting ready..she said i muz dress up nice & pretty hee..initally wasnt in the mood cos of the strain that my parents were hoping him to go for the dinner wif us but he dint wish to..but decided not to think abt it..juz doll up & go for the occasion..reached the place & saw alot of pple whom i've seen b4 but cant rem their names..i m like wearing a mask when talking to them..pple praised that im gettin prettier & a guai daughter but for me the only thing that i was hopin frm the praises was for my mum to feel proud..i noe how much injustice my mum suffered when she was younger frm this side of relatives..so i told myself i muz be a daughter that can make her proud in front of these pple..& i think i did well..
During the wedding, i realized that i m not looking forward to getting married at all..& worse i do feel a little fear abt this issue..wats wrong wif me..to hav lost faith & hope in this..i hope i can regain the faith in time to come & be happily married then..
After the dinner, uncle ah bee & uncle ah lam jio dad for karaoke & drinks..their wives oso urged my mum to go..so as their daughter i followed them along cos i noe my mum will b bored i can be there to acc her & my dad wil get drunk if i dun help him wif the drinks..ended up at Shenton Way ktv..& i think i drank more than 10 mugs of beer..i lost count after the 8th mug i think..he dint msged me the whole day til ard 1am askin me how was the dinner?probably he was afraid of my parents asking him to join thats y he waited til that hr to contact me..sigh..told him the dinner was ok & me wif dad they all for drinks..he said he's watching tv & cant get to sleep juz like the nite b4..i told him to get some rest & went back to my drinks..ard 3+ he msged me again asked me where i m..but i only saw the msg half hr later so replied him that i m still outside wif them..after tat no reply frm him oso dunno izzit he dozed off or wat but i was quite high at that pt of time liao..reach hme forced myself to bathe & concussed straight on bed wif my hair still wet..that was 6am..duh..
Slept til 2+ in the afternoon..woke up feeling groggy cos of the late nite yesterday & the dunno how many mugs of beer i drank..decided not to waste my day rottin at home so went to rebond my hair..chose a neighbourhood saloon cos cheaper than the usual Kimage i went to..msg him to tell him but he dint reply until 5+ told me he was sleepin & watchin tv now..that he msged me ard 3+ last nite cos he cant get to sleep..hmm was wondering wat can i do to help the nite b4 actually..when i m outside wif my relatives..asked him to rest well since its a holiday then i went on wif my rebonding session..
Reached hme juz in time to watch the last ep of 心晴大动员 hosted by Christopher Lee & Quan Yi Feng..ended up crying while watching the show..not only i emphatize wif the pple in the pgm, i oso felt damn guilty for not makin much effort to make my life better despite my having more than them..they r such strong warriors fightin the obstacles in their lives..i really really hope that i m courageous enuf to start afresh soon..the past has no power over us..the past is over & done..it doesnt matter how long we've had a neg pattern, the point of power is in the present moment..i need to choose to release the past & forgive everyone,myself included..i may not noe how to forgive, n may not want to forgive, but the very fact that i said im willin to forgive begins the healin process isnt it..it is imperative for my own healing tat i release the past & forgive everyone..well i noe easier said than done..but i muz force myself to kick bad habits rite..
Oh ya got to talk wif HuiJun lately..who say EX's ex cannot be frens?hahahha..we can click quite well cos i think somehow we've similar personalities..but she's much more positive than me in life..she said that she's goin to be my mentor in healing heehee..& shared wif me alot things frm the past..well, pple may not seem as wat they r even though u might hav known them for many yrs..haiz..anyway, its over..i had a really bad 2008 when i spent most of my time in pain, tears, anger, hatred & all neg stuff..i hope that 2009 can be a fresh start for me..& a better year..jiayou!
This is how i look like on sunday before i went for cousin's wedding..keke..
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